“Swag Party Confidential!” by Richard F. Yates

Greetings Citizens!!!

Today on The Primitive Entertainment Workshop, we’ll be talking about consumerism and art, with a heavy focus on why some creatures MAKE art, and why you should BUY art from certain beings. (This message brought to you by the “Citizens for a Less Poor Richard F. Yates” Society…)

First off, this question must be answered (again): What is ART? Art is the stuff that happens when someone does a little EXTRA beyond eating, sleeping, reproducing, and dying. Let’s look at a simple creature, like a bird. Birds break out of their shells, eat some worms, learn to fly, try to attract a mate (sometimes before and sometimes after making a nest,) reproduce, and drop dead. It’s a decent life—but some birds want MORE. Some birds make SHINY nests. Some birds learn to talk so they can get onto YouToob. Some birds take up dancing, in the hopes that Soul Train or Solid Gold will make a comeback and they’ll get a close-up and be allowed to show off their sick moves. Some birds learn to sing freaky songs and then scare folks who wander into the woods at night. And you know, all that extra stuff is ART! And it turns out, even some humans make art…

Now here’s the weird thing: ART is usually something you DO, not something you HAVE, but humans have fucked that all up, and most of them now believe that ART is the PRODUCT, not the performance or the creative process. (ART is what you find in a museum or gallery—instead of what you DO when you’re not eating or sleeping or reproducing.) Fine. Whatever. Art is the THING that someone has made… Sure.

So an ARTIST makes something (a picture, a song, a poem, a dance move,) and SOMETIMES other folks recognize how neat that thing is and they clap and throw some change in the artist’s guitar case or hat, but most of the time artists just make their stuff and get nothing for it. Some of the WEIRDER artists make stuff for YEARS, pile up their art in boxes (see Ray Johnson or Henry Darger or that Richard F. Yates guy) and then die BEFORE folks go “Hey! That stuff’s really cool. I should give that artist some money, so they can eat and pay their rent and make MORE art!” And that’s a shame… Happens a lot.

SO (long way ‘round) here’s your chance to give an artist some dough BEFORE he (in this case it’s a he, but it’s not always a he) before he dies.

I’ve recently put the following works up on Redbubble, meaning that you can have these images surgically grafted onto coffee mugs, t-shirts, leggings, stickers, posters, post-cards, and so on. (I love post-cards most of all. If you want a post-card of any of these images, or of any of the more than 400 OTHER images I’ve got up on Redbubble, just look under “greeting cards” and click the “size” button. For some reason, a post-card is just a differently sized greeting card, in the eyes of Redbubble.) I TRIED to put these images onto Threadless, as well, but I gave up after trying for a long time and having very little luck. I’ve used Threadless for over a year now, and I’ve never had a sale through that outlet, so I’m kind of giving up on it, unless someone gives me a reason to keep trying. Redbubble, on the other hand, has been luckier for me. I’ve sold t-shirts, stickers, post-cards, leggings—even a clock—through Redbubble, so I’m sticking with it! (In fact, I sold a t-shirt this very morning! Neat!!!) Anyway, here are the newest PRINT ON DEMAND products that I’ve made available. And, yes, I know that making it myself is cooler, but the up-front cost of printing a hundred t-shirts or 1,000 stickers or post-cards is prohibitive to me. I’m SERIOUSLY poor and infirm and psychologically scarred from my difficult and traumatic life, so I do what’s cheapest (and then cross my fingers!) Yeah…..so here’s the new stuff:

The Plot Thickens
the plot thickens (12 Sep. 2017) by rfy - (peg)

The Chase (Part Two)
the chase (2 - green) (18 nov. 2017) by rfy - (peg)

The Creature (Ready for the Spring Formal)
the creature (ready for the spring formal) (18 mar. 2018) by rfy - (peg)

The Beginning is Near…
the beginning is near... (3 mar. 2018) by rfy - (peg)

Black Dog
black dog (12 jan. 2018) by rfy - (peg)

Flying Carrot
flying carrot (4 feb. 2018) by rfy - (peg)

Sorry Ass S.O.B.
sorry ass s.o.b. (10 aug. 2018) by rfy - (peg)

Now, for those of you who have been following the CRYPTO-ART saga, I’ve also been schmoozing up to this new site that allows me to create UNIQUE CRYPTO-ART pieces, in limited editions, which are defined and traded using block-chain technology and Ethereum crypto-currency. It’s freaky stuff, which makes me think I might actually be helping to create The Terminator (not necessarily a good thing), but I’m still intrigued for some reason. So far, I’ve designed SEVEN original pieces (each with a limited edition of 3 copies, and that’s all there will ever be,) and they are on sale for .01 Ether (which is about TWO BUCKS each, give or take 20 cents—depending the current market value of Ethereum, which fluxuates throughout the day depending on the trading price on the stock market… Like I said, it’s weird…) I have released SEVEN individual pieces so far, but I’m not sure how stable to the individual item URLs are, so if you want to see my STORE, click THIS LINK! (All of these items should be there. Let me know if it doesn’t work, PLEASE!):

Super Lame

Bunny Wearing a Mask (Surrounded by Snakes)

Pitched Battle (Uncolorized Raw Cut)

Simply Irresistible (Glamour Photo)

She is Just Going To…

Mr. Snoot

Lost Love

So, now that you’ve seen some of the bits I have to offer (I also sell BOOKS, by the way,) I’m asking you to consider dropping some cash for a starving artist. (I LITERALLY tried to buy fast food today for lunch, but my card declined! I probably shouldn’t be telling this story…) And I have a BILL coming up in December (less than three months away,) for which I will need to have about $100.00 to pay for my next year’s WEB ACCESS for the site (so there aren’t any adverts on The Primitive Entertainment Workshop, AND so that I can keep all of the artwork that’s already up on the site. I’m over the memory allotment that would be covered by the “free” plan, and if I don’t pay for the “PRO” plan, some of the artwork that’s currently up is going to be removed(!!!) which sucks, and I won’t be able to put anything NEW up without taking down even more old stuff… That’s where we’re sitting, at the moment.) So I need about $100.00 by the middle of December to keep all this FINE Primitive Entertainment coming your way! What do ‘ya say? Are you in a position to help out??? (I also have a Ko-Fi page—although that’s produced bupkis, so far…) (“Just keep smiling,” he says to himself. “People respond to confidence and good humor!”) You folks have been great! Be sure to tip your waitress!!!

—Richard F. Yates
(Primitive Thoughtician and Supreme Bunny Lord of The P.E.W.)



About richardfyates

Compulsive creator of the bizarre and absurd. (Artist, writer, poet, provocateur...)
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