DIM Battle Confession from Brother O’Brien

As fellow Dimmers, you know that one of our core practices is the confession of sins. Unlike Catholicism, however, our reasoning is a tad different. Here at DIM, we think sinning is the bee’s knees and encourage the frequent commitment of such – BUT, we also encourage the confession of our sins, solely for bragging purposes.

Therefore, with regard to the battle between Brothers Yates and Erdahl, I must admit/boast that I have been adding gasoline to the fire (I tried marshmallow crème, but that just made the room smell nice). Full disclosure: I was on a power-grab for the Benevolent Order of DIM, Yippy. It’s true: I wanted the BOODY for myself.

My sabotage efforts consisted of telling Brother Yates that Brother Erdahl called him a “poltroon” and telling Brother Erdahl that Brother Yates had called him a “sauce-box.” Then, just for fun, I sent Brother Yates 6 pizzas topped only with candy corn (hee!) and had Brother Erdahl’s favorite grandmother committed to a mental asylum from which she will never return (giggle).

More sins to come…

—Brother O’Brien

About richardfyates

Compulsive creator of the bizarre and absurd. (Artist, writer, poet, provocateur...)
This entry was posted in church of dim, humor, religion, satire and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s